Over a decade ago I was inspired by a revered and popular public figure who ran their first marathon sometime after turning 40. I said, "I'd like to do that one day - run a marathon - sometime in my 40's". Fast forward to November 3rd, 2010, and within minutes of the clock striking midnight, I cried myself to sleep. I had turned 40. My tears were not due to the actual number, but over the fact that my life didn't look like what I thought it would at this age. I was childless despite every effort not to be, and behind closed doors I was hopeless and lifeless. I had many broken dreams and a broken spirit to match.

A month after turning 40 I remembered my words all those years ago and asked my health care practitioner whether I'd be physically able to run a marathon (especially being 20kg / 45 pounds overweight), and if so - how long would I need to prepare. He replied, "12 months". I asked, "Would 11 be okay?" He nodded. That night I registered for the New York City Marathon and the next morning, I started my training program (which was written for me by an expert in aerobic endurance training). To ensure nothing stopped me from realising my dream (like luck in the lottery selection process), I registered with a charity and have a guaranteed place. I now have 9 months to go before I head to New York and realise my dream - running the marathon, three days after my 41st birthday.

This is my journey...

Tuesday, 1 March 2011

Bloggy birthday to me...

Today marks 1 year since I started blogging.

I launched Project Grace 2010 on this day last year, which was supposed to be an 8-month mission to find myself along with my long lost mojo before turning 40 in November. My birthday came and went and I continued to blog.

On the first day of 2011, I invented Trailing Grace - though between you and me, I think it was ahead of its time as I discovered very few people wanted to trail a yet-to-be-somebody. It wasn't long before 9MonthsToNewYork was born, which is attracting far more interest - thus inspiring me to deliver daily.

I look at my life now and how it has transformed over the past 12-months. In a word, ENORMOUSLY.

My spirit has been revived, as has faith in myself. Each day brings greater clarity and with it comes strength and conviction. Just as the erosion of my spirit was a gradual decay, the rebuilding has been an equally slow and steady process. I feel that if we're not going in one direction in life, we're heading in another (usually the complete opposite). I am so grateful that after hitting the bottom, I am gently heading upwards. Phew.

I attribute 99.9% of this about turn to my blogging. It has provided me with an open form of expression. I type almost as fast as I can talk, therefore my fingers have become an extension of my thoughts and feelings (it's wild). Blogging has been an amazing journey, and one that I do not want to end anytime soon.

As much as we bloggers like to say "We do it for ourselves", let's be honest in admitting that having an audience has an impact - a big one at that. It's what separates blogging from a personal diary. I've tried the latter and it bored me. Blogging moves me. Knowing that I might entertain, engage, inspire, inform, delight, distract and / or challenge you, the reader, fills me with an enormous sense of pleasure. That's the reward.

It's not about money, it's not about fame (though either or both would be welcome), it's about connection. That's why I do it. I love to share my journey - what lessons I've learned, challenges I've overcome and tips I've discovered. In the process, I feel connected and that's what keeps me coming back day after day, week after week.

It is due to you being you, that allows me to be person that I want to be - one who is fully self expressed, open in communication and strong in vulnerability. For that, I am very grateful.

Until tomorrow, remember to give heartfelt thanks when opportunity presents itself - despite not knowing what happened to the 0.1%.

Grace xx

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